View Full Version : Puns, Get them While They're Hot

03-08-2012, 08:56 PM
Why isn't there a thread devoted to the epicness that is puns yet? Here's a couple to get started on.

I need to Goku the doctor. My head is Krillin me.

When William joined the army he disliked the phrase fire at will.

My friend Matt was feeling embarrassed because his facial hair was quite a mess the other day. After poking fun at him, he yelled at me, "Stop talking about the beard!"

I asked him, "Matt, just the beard, or facial hair in general? Because I mustache you a question."

He then screamed at the top of of his lungs, "NO! STOP!"

So I calmly replied, "Okay, I'll shave it for later."

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

Have at it, guys!

03-08-2012, 09:15 PM
I would give you a link to guide you to the first topic made on this, but it is in the past.

03-08-2012, 09:20 PM
Why would you post a link the the past? That's so dark of you. Shedding some twilight on this would be just messing with the ganon of the franchise.

03-08-2012, 09:29 PM
Oh Kamicon. I'm just trying to brighten the mood with a bit of dark humor. Do you Yami to try light humor?all of my puns are a stretch...I should work them out more... =s

03-09-2012, 09:10 AM
I wanted to watch a documentary on Northern Canadian territories, but I saw Nunavut.

03-09-2012, 09:33 AM
Me and the ocean are tight. It waves at me every time I drive by.

03-09-2012, 12:12 PM
Me and the ocean are tight. It waves at me every time I drive by.
I can sea what you did there, but I dare spray me and the ocean are much better off. I've ridden it's "waves" if you know what I mean.

03-09-2012, 01:28 PM
Me and the ocean are tight. It waves at me every time I drive by.
I can sea what you did there, but I dare spray me and the ocean are much better off. I've ridden it's "waves" if you know what I mean.
Watery at beast, you've made a grave mistake and this ocean of puns will unfurl your sails.....(forgive me.) Yes it is true we've been on stranger tides before, but they've been washed away with the seafoam to davy jone's lockah(too soon?)But avast, for aye too have treaded on choppy waters such as puns. But the seasalt in my wounds bare nothing but a cyclone of anguish and despair. Do not sail in these muddy waters little buddy, for ye shall be submerged in an endless ocean of scurvy wrath that is...the pun. Thankyou. (This was more reffence then puns, but I gotta float with it)

03-09-2012, 02:37 PM
That was some smooth sailing you did there Branch. Sorry thats all i have, my pun ideas are on a low tide and have not been rising.

03-09-2012, 05:08 PM
I rather garden than sail but my shovel is nowhere to be seed.

03-09-2012, 06:16 PM
Water you guys doing in this thread? Wet will we ever need to tell puns? I should Scald you all for your efforts, I should shoot you with my Water Gun or perhaps my Hydro Cannon. This is seriously sending me into a Frenzy Plant, leaf me alone for a while. It bugs me how threads like this can really Dragon.

And that my friends is why I'm full of...Charm.

YEEEEEEEEEEEAH (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z9rD4Paq0zE&feature=related)

03-09-2012, 07:00 PM
Here's a Clamperl of wisdom for you all. The thrill of the chase is what makes the Huntail all that much more Gorebyss.

Audino what I'm even saying, but hey, Wynaut while I'm making the Rounds?

03-09-2012, 07:03 PM
You wanna know why they call me the Slowking of Puns? Because people have to pay me royalties for my puns.

03-09-2012, 09:49 PM
Guys, guys, you're doing puns ALL WRONG. I know this may seem Oddish coming from me, but just give me a Chansey! I hope you guys can Diglett these puns, just don't start Koffing or Weezing. It's cool, you'll all be fine. Woops, sorry. Didn't mean to Jynx you. Jeez, throw me a Cubone will ya? I'm a little Slowpoke today, you know? It's tough to come up with puns on demand, so I can't be asked to just stand and Delibird. If puns aren't great, people might get Krabby. They might go Zubat-shit insane. Don't get your Tentacruels in a bunch, you hear me? I had one Whooper of a meal today. Woops, better not Slakoth now, that was pretty bad. I'm so Tentacool, I makes myself Shuckle. What? Can't think of anything to top these puns? A little Grumpig, I presume? But, who knows who'll come out Hitmontop? Man, its hard to come up with these puns at Rapidash succession. The upperhand is always Shiftry, so ya never know. These forums has so many members, I'm starting to feel Cloysterphobic. It doesn't matter how many puns you come up with because I'm still Kingler. Don't REST just yet. Oh Paras the thought. But surely it's Natu all doom and Gloom, some of these are pretty Bellossom. Reaching into the Unown, putting a Spinda on common phrases, it's anything but a Snorlax, so say it Loudred and say it proud!

04-03-2012, 08:46 AM
A bird pooped on me today. I'd make a pun about me feeling crappy, but I'm too pissed off to.

04-03-2012, 11:18 AM
A bird pooped on me today. I'd make a pun about me feeling crappy, but I'm too * off to.

I'll bet you were spitting feathers.

04-03-2012, 11:28 AM
Yeah, there's still a fowl odor on my jacket.

05-05-2012, 04:21 AM
Do these Puns count? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAlofH6ywac&feature=youtu.be)

05-07-2012, 11:28 AM
Do these Puns count? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAlofH6ywac&feature=youtu.be)
Oww.... my SOUL...

05-07-2012, 02:09 PM
Poor people don't have any BRITCHES. :I

French history puns...haha.

06-23-2012, 11:11 AM
<pun remove due to epicness>

[ Post made via iPhone ]

06-23-2012, 11:31 AM
One day, Professor Snape was late to Potions class; to avoid embarrassment he tried to just slither-in.

06-23-2012, 12:48 PM
I was talking to a friend about a doctor that he went to see a while ago named Doctor Foreman. I asked him what kind of grill he uses. He was going to walk away, but I apologized and asked him if he knew what he did before he was a doctor. He said he didn't know and asked why I would ask something like that. I responded with "Well, I'm pretty sure I used to have that doctor and he told me a story about his interesting position in the mining industry." He then told me he hates me and never wanted to talk to me again.

06-27-2012, 12:05 PM
As time has Lapras, i've noticed that time is a dish best served OLD...